Fill up your cup
I love my four kiddos beyond words & I am so thankful for them. I give them my all, everyday: homeschooling, cooking, cleaning, loving them, praying, breaking up fights, giving haircuts and I wouldn’t change it for anything. BUT sometimes, I NEED a break. Can good mamas even say (or write that) that without feeling guilty??
Yes we can friends, because Mama...you too need a break, you are normal and human and can’t do everything, all of the time. For some reason, I don’t know if it’s the homeschool culture, or Christian culture or just my own wrong thoughts, but for a long time I felt guilty for wanting and needing a break from my kids, who I believe are gifts from God. And maybe that’s it, if I truly believe they are gifts, then I shouldn’t need or want a break for them, right?? Wrong...because our enemy, Satan, is always lurking around trying to make us less impactful, make us feel guilty and bad about our lack of doing enough (these are not thoughts from Jesus, unless you really are using your time poorly).
How will God be able to use us to show our kids and families true joy and love for Himself and others if we are swimming in our Mommy guilt, worn out, exhausted and annoyed? He won’t friends, and our adversary will win.
So how do we recharge? How do we do self care, which is suddenly so popular in our culture, as women who love God and want to please Him first?
Create a daily time out. For me, I believe I need to start my day with time focusing on God and all He’s given me. I like to journal 3-5 things that I’m grateful for, pray, read and study my Bible and listen to worship music. Do I do this every morning? No, and I can tell a difference in my attitude and schedule when I don’t. This will look different for everyone but I’d encourage you to keep your phone put away and not dive into the tasks of your day before you take this time to focus. Find a quiet, pretty place that makes you happy and where you can focus yourself.
Do something you love! I love spending time with people and helping others build community, so there’s nothing like a good girls’ night in or out to recharge my batteries! If your hubby is gone (like mine often is), invite friends over to your house! I love coffee play dates and Bunco nights! You could pick up a new hobby or pick an old one back up, read a good book...just do something, once a month. Put it on your calendar and carve out that time so it doesn’t get sucked up by the laundry.
Get help! If you need help with the housework, hire someone to help once or twice a month. Can’t afford it? Maybe think about hiring a tweenager. Trade with your friends for childcare so you can each have a couple of hours of alone time to do all of your chores, have your time out or just relax!!!
Find your people! We were created to live in community and be part of the body (1 Corinthians 12). If you’re an introvert, start with having one mama over for coffee, extroverts...invite the neighborhood! Join local Facebook groups or local meet-ups. If you homeschool too, I would say you NEED a group! Find a community co-op, they’re everywhere nowadays, join Classical Conversations (what program we do and love), join a mama and me activity group, go to the library during story or activity times, find a group of mamas or women at church, join a Bible study, you get the picture. Find other like minded women and stick together. This life is hard, and it’s so much sweeter and full of joy with friends.
Pray, and pray again. Pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). I love the story of Susanna Wesley, the mother of Charles and John Wesley, she had 19 children and still found a way to pray....she would lift her apron over her head and tell her children she was praying and wasn’t to be disturbed. If a mama of 19 can carve out time to pray, we can too.
We have to take time away to fill ourselves up, reset, meet new friends, take time to be trained in our businesses or crafts, pray & re-focus, and have FUN, so we can continue to pour ourselves into our families. I promise you will be so much more effective if you fill up your cup first before trying to pour into those you love.💕
